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The only time you do not feel alone is when with another combat veteran.
There are countless hidden costs of combat that Warriors pay. Most combat veterans – including this writer – feel that war was the high point of our lives, and emotionally, life has been downhill ever since. This was not our idea, we got that way doing our duty in combat situations such as: This unforgettable experience of being sky-high on aliveness/adrenaline is why you come home basically “thrill-crazy” – that is, to use a slang expression, you do things now that you once thought were “crazy” in order to obtain thrills/excitement.
The biggest surprise of your life is to survive the war.
As always, your comments are welcome and an indication to us that his words are helping veterans.
But the numb-up/shut-down mechanism does not work like a tight, narrow rifle shot; it works like a broad, spreading shot gun blast.
Thus when you numb up your fear, you numb up virtually all other feelings as well.
I never met Paul Allen in person but I came across his writing: (the “Code”). The more I learned about his life the more I was exposed to his demons.
Unfortunately many people don’t understand the daily torment the combat veteran faces and what it can do to them or make them do in order to relieve their pain.